Witchy Woman

When attending an SCA camping event, don't forget your towel.  I know what you're thinking, "There usually aren't any showers, why on earth would I need my towel?"  Here are the various ways a towel can really come in handy without leaving the planet.

1.  Rain

If you're in An Tir, you already know to expect rain even if the forecast is clear.  Once a person is wet hypothermia becomes a real concern.  The first thing you should do is get them dry.

2.  Swimming Hole

Even if there aren't any showers, there might be a spot to go swimming.  If you choose to do so, familiarize yourself with the site rules.  At one event I attended swimming was normally allowed but for the blue-green algae bloom.  A few attendees hadn't heard/paid attention to the town cries and went swimming anyway.  No one got sick that I know of, but please listen to your heralds, we often do have helpful information.

3.  Dew

Unless you're wearing all the layers of clothing required by women's late period Elizabethan, sitting on a cold, damp chair or bench is extremely unpleasant in the morning.

4.  Camouflage

I normally bring a burgundy towel and drape it over my ice chest to disguise the bright white and blue plastic.  It's easily moved when I need to get into the chest.

5.  Extra Layer

My towel has been known to double as an extra blanket on nights where it dipped below freezing.  At my first An Tir/West War I had forgotten my air mattress, that towel helped to shield me from the heat-sucking earth.

6.  Bubblewrap

Even if I don't end up using the towel for anything other than camouflage, it works great for cushioning my breakable kitchen items.

1. When meeting newcomers, I am not to cry out, "Fresh meat!"

2. The Prince and Princess are not to be addressed as "Your Pretty Goodness."

3. I will not feed the drunks lutefisk.

4. Wet chemise contests are to be held only after dark.

5. Medieval torture devices and Pied Piper do not mix.

6. I will not tell newcomers to "wave to the pretty, pretty princess!"

7. Whilst acting as a chirurgeon, I will not use any period medical techniques, including but not limited to: bleeding, maggots, or trepanning.

8. No matter how long and beautiful a person's hair is, they are not to be called "Lady Lovelilocks." Especially if the person in question is a gentleman.

9. At no point am I to cackle maniacally to myself within earshot of newcomers, media, or moderns.

10. Royalty is not to be referred to as pointy hats, muckety mucks, nor grand high poo-bah.

11. When drawing my weapon I will not announce, "By [For] the power [honour] of Grayskull!"

12. While wearing woad and nothing else was period, it is NOT appropriate.

13. When traveling to Canada, I will not sing, hum, nor quote any of the lyrics to "Blame Canada."

14. Telling a pun so bad it makes a WOAW groan is NOT something of which to be proud.

15. I will not call animal control to round up rabbit-skin bikini clad young women.

16. I will not douse the goths with holy water.

17. I will not shout "I don't believe in faeries!" to women in faerie wings just to see if they keel over dead.

18. If it's well-received at the Bawdy Bardic, it is not acceptable for Pied Piper.

19. Psychological warfare is allowed. Fashioning your helm to resemble a gimp mask is not.

20. I will not name my persona "Bigus Dickus."

21. While fighting at war, I will not dismember nor mutilate the bodies.

22. While watching at war, I will not loot the bodies.

23. I will not cup-check the young men to see who stuffs their codpieces and who does not.

24. When acting as a royal guard in court, I will not demand that a gentle perform the Truffle Shuffle before entering.

25. I will not refer to newbie fighters at war as any of the following: redshirts, meatshields, nor cannon fodder.

26. While serving as a chirurgeon, I will not dress Repo Man from Repo! The Genetic Opera.

27. No matter how innocent and polite I am, I will not ask the good Landsknecht gentle if they were set upon by a pack of rabid squirrels.

28. I will not yell "Freebird!" at the Bardic Circle.

29. I will not hide whoopy cushions on the thrones.

30. It is never appropriate to refer to your friends as Slappy, Happy, and Jappy. Even if their respective personas are fighter, jester, and Asian.

31. I will not command any modern-clad male royal to "Dance, nakie-boy, dance!"

I am privileged to attend Knowne World Heraldic and Scribal Symposium, which will be held in a far warmer and more humid Kingdom than An Tir. Since I detest the heat as well as wanted something a bit more flashy than a plain, unlayered t-tunic, I looked at what I had around my house and made a chiton (post to follow).

The only problem was, was that I needed pins for it and had already attended one event this month. So whatever garb I make has to be from what I already have on hand due to finances, and I have no experience in metalworking whatsoever. I ventured out into the garage and found a small coil of wiring.

First of all: layers. Layers lend adaptability to An Tir's weather, which is only predictable in that one should always be prepared for cold and rain. But on the chance that we are blessed with clear, warm weather, heavier outer layers can be shed in favour of linen underlayers.

Wool was the predominant fiber choice, and we all know wool's wonderful qualities, namely it's absorbency and water-repelling abilities. Very helpful if you are facing the prospect of hypothermia on Independence Day.

Durability. This month marks my one year anniversary of playing, and I have made it through the year with only my Norse gear and a spare gown. My infamous green tunic (so named because Máel Brigte is difficult for people to pronounce and they always recognize me by my garb) only has a small grease stain. My original apron dress was recycled a few months ago for many reasons, none of which were related to questions of durability. Keep in mind that these have withstood grease, sweat, mud, dust, sun, wind, and rain.

There are many methods and styles of decoration: beads, woven trim, and embroidery. As well as the accessories.

The Norse were famous for their martial prowess, and it's not difficult to make a fighter's kit (at least not in comparison to, say, Gothic plate).

In short, it's fun, practical, and an easy persona to slip into for an entire weekend.

Lady Jadwiga Wlodzislawska has taken on the A&S 50 Challenge in an insane way. She is depicting all 50 years of the Society's history in a Bayeux-inspired tapestry.

Last Wednesday, at the Mid-Willamette Valley Fighter's Practice, I suited up in armour for the first time. Granted, it was loaner gear and was therefore one-size-fits-nobody, but afterwards I had a definite opinion as to what I want in my own gear.

Luckily I hadn't planned on actually fighting, or else I would have been dismayed to find that I simply could not do so safely nor effectively in the loaner kit. For one thing, it was sized to fit large men. While I am not thin, I fall just short of 5 feet 4 inches in shoes. The kidney plates hung around my hips, breastplates pinched my nipples in a decidedly non-sexy fashion, and the heater-shield was not only too large, but poorly balanced for me. The knight who was teaching me how to throw a shot laughed at me because the helm sank so low that eventually all he could see was the bottoms of my eyes.

One of the most important things I learned is, is that I require rigid armour for my vast tracts of land. The splint's (using Dungeons and Dragons terminology as I do not know the SCAdian) flexion was exacerbated by its poor fit, yet even without the force of a hit behind it, tender flesh caught between metal plates is far from enjoyable.

At least I won't have problems with hurdle number three.

Summit's Winter Investiture, or 11th Night, was an incredibly emotional experience, more so than I had anticipated. Let me preface this by saying that I worked a graveyard shift, drove 45 minutes to Salem, and then on to Roseburg. I ultimately had been awake for approximately 31 hours straight. Coincidentally, it is inadvisable to consume more than two energy drinks in a 24 hour period. Also, I am extremely grateful to Rhieinwylydd Verch Einion Llanaelhaearn for loaning the use of her hotel room to shower and change out of scrubs before dragging me off to heraldric activities.

Most attendees had been playing for some time, so in some ways it was like being the new girlfriend of a socially awkward cousin at a family reunion, only without the significant other. But once the initial social anxiety of so many people crammed into a cement-floored enclosure wore off, it was easier to realize how many friends I had made in my first year of actively playing and how grateful I was to be able to come and celebrate. In a way, it was like a combination of all the holidays of the season.

While most courts on a smaller scale can be really fun (if you've ever witnessed the awarding of a Baronial Brownie, you know what I mean), extended formal ceremonies can be tedious due to the length, lack of amplification (especially if you're in the back), and people you only know via wordfame. This one really got to me, and not because of the lack of sleep, either.

When I first began playing, I camped with fringies who would never be caught dead at any organized activity at an event that wasn't a party. They told me that court was boring and there's no point in going since you have to "suck up to the right people" in order to get recognized (they also neglected to mention that you end up knowing people in offices by getting involved). And all people in offices are obsessed with status and will look down their nose at you for being a newbie, not having an award, etc., regardless of their personality and previous predisposition to arrogance. I took their advice, not realizing that I was missing out on receiving a newbie necklace.

There is a tradition, at least in An Tir, that newbies at their first event receive a token from Their Highnesses, usually coins stamped for their Coronation. During their reign, Viscount Gabriel Luveday and Viscountess Sumayya min Yibna gave out necklaces of silver spirals suspended from silver roses separated from the central figure of a silver elephant by red and blue beads. The theory being that gentles recognizing them can help guide and encourage the wearer.

While witnessing Their Alpine Highnesses' stepping down ceremony, I realized that they really blew all the misconceptions I had been told out of the water. She took genuine pride and joy in giving awards, embracing newbies, and generally welcoming any and all she met. (That is not to say that Gabriel was any less approachable, just that he is much less eloquent in formal settings). They really embodied everything that I came to learn that the SCA could be: gracious, warm, and inclusive. By shattering my preconceived notions, they helped to create a lifelong member as well as a retinue member for Prince Durin and Princess Ceridwen's fourth reign.

In the aftermath of court, I approached Sumayya, who took the time to listen to me try to communicate all this. Later, I commented to Lady Elizabeth Turner de Carlisle that I wished I had, had gotten a newbie necklace because now it meant more to me than a bauble. She resolved the situation by yelling, "Hey, Sumayya, you have any more necklaces? She never got one!"

Ahhh, friends.

That's "caligae", not "Caligula." Here's a short description with pictures of my friend's experiment in shoemaking for his Roman legionnaire persona.

For those of you in Oregon's Willamette Valley, Adiantum is hosting an Arts and Sciences Social Day this Saturday at the Santa Clara Church of Christ from 10 am to 5 pm.

Brigit of Guernsey is holding one of her fabulous dye workshops, starting at 11. If you ever have an opportunity to dye with her, do it! I met her at the Underwear Party (no, not that kind. Get your mind out of the gutter). It was my first ever A&S Day, and I was focusing on making my underwear and playing with Idonia's spinning wheel, rather than the other classes. Towards the end of the day, she shoved a skein of wool at me and told me to go dye it. I looked at her in confusion and sheepishly admitted that I did not have any cash on me for her materials fee. She said not to worry about it because she couldn't bear seeing the rest of the dye go to waste. As a newbie, I was thrilled with her generosity and willingness to drag shy folk along to play with wool and boiling pots.

Idonia is teaching a class on veils with handrolled hems from 1-2 pm. Considering the abominable attempts I've made, I'm going to take it. She is marvelously patient and knowledgeable, which are invaluable qualities in an A&S Minister. Heck, she puts up with me when I seem to forget how to do fingerloop braiding and has to reteach me at every single event.

Then there's dancing, which is nowhere near as difficult as it may appear. Every event that I have been to that has had dancing has had at least an instruction period for newcomers and those who need a refresher. Not to mention that partners and neighbours are more than willing to help guide you along. And gentlemen, you don't have to "lead" like you do in modern dances!Period dances were essentially the equivalent of speed-dating, so if you don't like your partner all you have to do is wait one rotation and you get a new one. Or one will cut in, which is probably the most entertaining part and can get quite competitive.

And then you get to fling candy confections with mini-catapults! A friend of mine has objections to using marshmallows for ammunition, afraid that this will only contribute to the SCA's already somewhat negative reputation in modern society. Because of safety, the projectiles have to be lightweight and blunt. What could be safer than tiny, edible pillows? They are also cheap and biodegradable. The only alternative I can think of is to wrap paper balls in tape, but that's more of an investment in both time and money. Plus, I think that it's a great way of getting kids involved as well. Besides, how many of us were introduced to engineering in physics classes by devising protection for eggs flung off of a roof? (By the way, if you devise a suspension system with rubberbands, make sure that there isn't enough slack for the egg to bounce against the container). If the potential publicity surrounding this particular event focuses on flying marshmallows above all else, then we've got bigger problems.

Hope to see you there!

Yes, that is my car. Yes, everything you see was both needed and used between myself and a friend who carpooled to Egil's this year. And I only packed a cotehardie (didn't have much garb of my own yet). Yes, that is the Army blanket cloak.

First, what do you need? Food, water, clothes, and shelter at the very least. Make a prioritized packing list including every single thing you can think of, once you have that you can start paring down unnecessary items. What do you need to be comfortable? This isn't "proper" camping where you are expected to rough it; SCAdians take pride in overpacking. Do you have a portable project? In what activities will you be participating? Once you're on site, you most likely won't want to make a store run. Packing lists you find online can be helpful in that they may include things that you did not consider, but do not rely on them. Use your favourite as a starting point and create your own master list that fits your needs. Mine is an Excel sheet that I tweak each time depending on the weather, length of the event, and what I plan on doing while there.

If you have a household, coordinate so that you can cut down on your packing. For example, is there a kitchen buy-in? Who has the largest and best day shade? Will someone be in charge of the firepit?

Do not pack so that you cannot unpack by yourself. Sure you can cram all your cast-iron into one Rubbermaid tub, but is that really a good idea? While most people are willing to help, they may very well be busy setting up camp themselves. Do not automatically expect assistance in unloading. If you do get it, remember what your mother told you: say thank you and offer to help them in return.

When you go to pack up the car, consider how you pack it. If you will arrive after dark, make sure that your tent and light source (I highly recommend a headlamp) are easily reached. You don't want to unload your garb, kitchen gear, and fighter kit just to set up your tent. Economize your space, thinking of it as Tetris in 3D. You would be amazed at what I can fit into my Buick Regal.

That's William de Nancy, pretending to pout over being crammed in such a tiny space. Or maybe it was fear over my driving, can't remember which. And yes, he did ride to the event like that. Packed in like that, not the pouting.

You will invariably both overpack and forget something important. One of my Innmates with the Inn of the Blue Boot actually forgot to pack garb for September Crown. I have consistently neglected to purchase an air mattress pump, but have been able to borrow one at every event this year. Somone will have a fully stocked first aid kit. Don't worry. Unless you forgot your medications. Then worry. A lot.

There is a growing movement of SCAdians who support inspirational equality, or allowing same-sex couples to enter Crown as contender and consort. At September Crown processional, Maestro Eduardo Lucrezia and Mistress Ariel de Courtenay organized a faction of An Tirians wearing purple armbands and bearing a letter of petition to Their Majesties. I am proud to say that I was one of them.

One of the most ridiculous arguments I have heard against the change is, is that it has no basis in history as previously homosexuals had to hide their sexuality. Even if that were the case (and I am not going to bother searching for evidence to the contrary), our anachronism is creative. There are practices which we do not involve in our re-creation, most notably institutional misogyny and racism. Not to mention, I won't be burned at the stake for being a witch (or hung, since my persona lived in Ireland).

There is no logical argument against the change. None.

There are the fringies who go in order to dress up and party. Then there are the rest of us. Most fringies were usually turned off from getting involved any further because of Garb Nazis and/or the clique-ishness that can happen with pointy hats and the peerage. Just remember that SCAdians were the geeks in high school, we are all human and have our pecularities. Some fringies object to the politics of the core. The truth is, is that whenever you get two or more people together politics are bound to happen. If you're like me and actually like history, crafting, theatre, and don't drink very much or very often then here are some tips for getting your feet wet.

The Society cannot operate without volunteers. Sites need prepping, people to run the event, and cleaning up afterwards. Unfortunately, not enough people are willing to do the work so the same people end up filling in the blanks, which is how you get Pelicans and burnouts. Many hands make light work is an old adage, but very true.

What do you like to do? If it's working with your hands, then take a class. There are classes for everything from cooking and basic sewing to metalwork and fighting. They are great to find out if you like the particular activity without investing a lot. If you like to work with people, then sign up for a shift or two at gate. Volunteers are always needed at gate and it's a great way to meet people as well as getting an idea for the event's schedule. If you have a theatre background or are simply loud, then offer to do town cry. Heralds are very welcoming and willing to train newbies. The chirurgeons (medics) are always looking for new members, although you do have to have a curent blue card and first aid/CPR certification. If you are not that much of a people person and have good computer skills, most SCA websites look like they were designed by drunken monkeys.

Now you know what you like to do, the question is how to go about it. Email the autocrat before an event and offer your services in specific areas. Subscribe to email lists because volunteers are often solicited there. There are even lists for guilds such as heralds or chirurgeons. While checking in at gate, see what slots they need filled.

There are competitions for various activities. Obviously there are the martial competitions, but there are also ones for the Arts and Sciences. There are generally standards for each level of experience. For example, they tend to go easier if you are new (either to the Society, competing, and/or the craft) and giving constructive criticism. Once you know better, the stricter the judging becomes.

Then there are what I like to call the Cookies. These can be literal or metaphorical. For example, I love being a herald: they give me bacon for being loud (a household gave me some bacon for warning them before doing town cry early in the morning). They tend to feed the Gate Trolls with sweets and water, and someone even gave me a pack of Super Mario Brothers fruit gummies because I laughed at the box that peeked out of their bag as they were signing in. I got a wooden comb for just doing a gate shift at Acorn War. Also at Acorn War, Macha agreed to let me do town cry for moot (aka court without Princes, Princesses, Kings, or Queens) from horseback.

And, of course, there are the awards. Contrary to popular belief, you don't necessarily have to "know the right people." True, you do generally have to be recommended by members of the populace, but if you do get involved, you will inevitably get noticed. Normally, active members here in An Tir receive the Goutte de Sang after one to two years of participation. This can take more or less depending on how active you are.

Hygiene was that of your typical male teenager: skip the shower and spray on some cologne. As those of us who survived public school can attest, the stronger the scent the “better” the result; thus the popularity of oils amongst those who could afford them. If you cannot tolerate modern chemical concoctions or the thought of topping off your cotehardie with JLo Glo makes you twitch, here are some all-natural recipes that can pass for period. Your housemates with chemical sensitivities might thank you.

They would have added lavender or rose water or orris to the final rinse while doing laundry, but I’m too lazy to do that. Instead, I make potpourri sachets that live in my Rubbermaid tub o’ garb. Being a hedgewitch, I look at what’s on hand that suits my purposes and experiment until satisfied. I believe that the current mixture is a base of rose and lavender petals with cinnamon and jasmine oils with a dash of ginger and cloves in a cotton bag made from scraps. The cinnamon, ginger, and cloves combine to make one spicy note instead of competing with each other. The potpourri staves off mustiness and serves as a mild insect repellant. If you don’t want to invest in various accoutrements, a quick and dirty solution is to fold in some lavender faggots. If your persona is late period, you could make a pomander.
Disclaimer: I have not tried either of the following recipes, but please let me know if you give them a go!

Cream Perfume
2 tablespoons grated beeswax 2 tablespoons sweet almond oil
1-2 teaspoons pure essential oils
Melt beeswax in an enamel or glass pan over boiling water. Add sweet almond oil; combine. Be patient with this step; it's important to blend them completely. Allow the mixture to cool slightly before adding oils of your choice. Fill small clean, dry glass jars with the solid perfume.

Body Spray
1 cup Everclear

1 teaspoon glycerin

1 teaspoon essential oils
Place ingredients into a sealable glass jar. Shake the jar vigorously until all ingredients are well combined. Decant into a glass bottle with a fine mist sprayer attached.

Here are some suggestions for period scents that are widely available today. You may want to do a bit more research as to what existed in your area at your time. Obviously, Middle Eastern personas would have had better access to more exotic oils, whereas lavender and rose would have been readily obtainable throughout most of Europe.

Floral

Jasmine
Lavender
Pennyroyal
Petitgrain
Primrose
Rose

Spice

Cinnamon
Frankincense
Myrrh
Neroli
Patchouli

As I’ve said before, I prefer to cook my meals ahead of time. Since my diet is restricted to organics, joining in on a meal plan with campmates is out of the question. Not to mention I’m not a member of a household yet, although there is a group with which I usually camp. I have a small tripod burner, but no sturdy table to use in the kitchen so it’s unwise to use it in fields of sun-baked grass. People literally have scars, both emotional and physical, from my mundane cooking. (Don’t worry, the doctors say they will heal in time). Besides, who wants to waste perfectly good event time or cook in the heat? Not to mention the lack of fun in cooking for one. If you’re a chef, then I recommend looking elsewhere for advice.
I favour finger foods so I don’t have to do dishes in camp or when I get home. My typical breakfast consists of fruit scones and tea. Even though I’m not in on my camp’s kitchen, I steal a bowl of hot water in the mornings for washing up and the tea in exchange for chores. In addition to set up, tear down, and generally keeping things tidy I’ll get up early to make the hot water and coffee or help with dishes.
There is the ever popular fruit, jerky, and bread and cheese. I bake a loaf of French bread and wrap it in a napkin or towel so I can just tear off hunks as I go, and pre-slicing cheese is always a good idea. I eat largely vegetarian because it’s hard to find organic meats where I live, not to mention they can be fairly expensive. If you can, sausage is a fine accompaniment. Other snacks for the sweet-toothed are cookies, fruit pies, or extra scones.
There are lots of period meat pie recipes out there; however, I haven’t tried them. My pie crusts always suck, not matter the recipe, but I make a batch of the dough. Then I cook up some hamburger and vegetables, fill up bits of the dough so that the finished product is shaped like a calzone that fits comfortably in the hand, and bake it at 350°F until browned, about 20-25 minutes. Cabbage, carrots, mushrooms, and onions are good vegetables to use, basically making a stew without the stew. While spices were expensive and hard to come by, herbs were both grown and wildcrafted for a variety of uses. That being said, I still use black pepper and a dash of salt. Basil, fennel, garlic, marjoram, oregano, parsley, rosemary, sage, and thyme are good choices with varying degrees of authenticity.
My cooler is a Goodwill find, and therefore is a little battered but perfectly serviceable. The food needs to at least stay cool, even though it’s already been cooked and might not be reheated. I pack meals in either individual hippyware (it’s like Tupperware, but in a previous life was plastic food containers) or tinfoil, which can also be reused at home for scrubbing in lieu of steel wool. I square and hem cloth scraps for napkins and hankies, depending on the size. If I’m busy, I just grab a pie or a snack and use a napkin as both a plate and to protect my garb since tables tend to be rare commodities.
Here are some recipes for sweet baked goods from various sources.

Bannocks
2 cups hot milk 1 ½ cups instant oatmeal 1 egg
½ tsp. baking soda 1 tbsp. grated orange peel 1 tbsp. chopped almonds
In a large bowl, pour the milk over the oatmeal; let it sit for 10 minutes. Beat in the egg, baking soda, orange peel and almonds. Consistency should be like a thick pancake batter. If the batter is too thin, add more oatmeal; if too thick, add a little milk. Heat griddle over a moderate flame, grease. Pour the batter onto the griddle; cook until bubbles form. Flip and cook the other side. Best served with butter and honey. Yields: 12 (2 inch) bannocks

Scones, Lemon-Oat
1/3 cup margarine or butter 1 ¼ cups all-purpose flour 1/2 cup quick-cooking oats
3 tablespoons sugar 2 ½ teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons grated lemon peel 1/2 teaspoon salt
1 egg, beaten ½ cup chopped almonds, toasted
4-6 tbsp. half-and-half 1 egg, beaten
Preheat the oven to 400ºF. Cut margarine into flour, oats, sugar, baking powder, lemon peel and salt with pastry blender in medium bowl until mixture resembles fine crumbs. Stir in 1 egg, the almonds and just enough half-and-half so dough leaves side of bowl.
Turn dough onto lightly floured surface; gently roll in flour to coat. Knead lightly 10 times. Roll or pat 1/2 inch thick. Cut with floured 2-inch round cutter or cut into diamond shapes with sharp knife. Place on ungreased cookie sheet. Brush 1 egg over dough.
Bake 10 to 12 minutes or until golden brown. Immediately remove from cookie sheet. Cool on wire rack. Split scones; spread with margarine and serve with strawberry preserves if desired.

Scones, Cranberry Cream
2 cups flour 1/3 cup sugar 1 tbsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt ½ cup cranberries 1 ¼ cup heavy cream
1 tsp. orange zest
Preheat the oven to 425°F. Mix the dry ingredients in a large bowl. With a large spatula, stir in the cranberries, cream, and orange zest. Gather the dough into a ball and knead it against the bottoms and the sides of the bowl 5-10 times. Transfer to a lightly floured surface, and pat the dough into a circle with a thickness of approximately 3/4 inch. Cut the dough into 8-12 inch wedges and place 1/2 inch apart on an ungreased baking sheet. Brush the tops with 2 to 3 tsp. of cream and sprinkle tops with cinnamon and sugar mixture (optional). Bake on the center oven rack for 12 to 15 minutes.

I will be helping out at Gold Key at the Long and Short of It. Speaking of garb, I had a nightmare last night that I was roadtripping to Pennsic. While driving through Iowa I realized that I had absolutely nothing non-mundane to wear while I was there.